changes

haven't updated in a LONNNG time, yet again. ): i've just been going through a lot. from journalism tryouts and skating practices to a QUEST hangout and awards ceremonies, i've been super busy and yet super inspired. i've had so many opportunities that others have not had, and because of this, i begin to wonder what i did to deserve it. 

i'm not going to go into any details, or even describe everything that's happened. i could very well do that, but i don't think just retelling such events would serve them the justice they deserve. i'll just say that there have been manymanymany things happening in my life, all of which have impacted me as a person. 

each event has been so incredibly unique, making it impossible to classify them as "good" or "bad." even our worst moments have bright sides to them, so labeling them like this just doesn't seem right to me. wow, i'm weird. hahaa. oh well, that's just the way i think, i guess. other people are welcome to do as they please. this is just my personal philosophy.

moving on... i've had the chance to become acquainted with some great artists within these past few weeks. i haven't met most of them, but just getting to know them through their art has brought me much closer. all of these are inspiring in their own ways, each bringing a different little bundle of talent and impact. it's people like this that make me fall in love with art all over again. and when i say "art," i mean everything from drawing and painting to singing and dancing. (:

it's late already. i have synchro in the morning. i'll finish up in the next post. 

spontaneity.

last night was literally one of the best ones i've had since school started. there is only one thing to blame for such a rare occurrence in my life: the lack of a plan. 

to kick off the night i went to a taiko concert to embrace my culture even more. haha. it was quite interesting, considering the amount of energy the performers had and the lack of enthusiasm the audience showed. i did enjoy it, though. (:

when i got home from the concert, it was about 10-ish. i actually planned on spending the night in and watching tv, but a last minute change of plans made everything much more exciting. we decided to go see star trek as a little spur-of-the-moment adventure in alhambra. as we approached the theater, i could feel my energy level picking up. seeing everybody out-and-about made me eager to be a part of the whole scene. the line we had to stand in to enter the theater made me even more ecstatic. i, being a bit of a skeptic, was expecting to see a mob of nerds with their spock ears and outfits waiting. however, i was greeted by a string of pleasant surprises. not one of the boys (and they were ALL guys) that surrounded me resembled a trekkie in any way whatsoever. in fact, there were a few cute, smiling faces in the crowd. from this point on, i knew the night was promising. (;

after the movie, which was my favorite of the year, we left the theater and hit up a local mcdonalds to get some food. even this small little event that helped comprise the night made an impact on me. i mean, it was 1 am and we were on the road, just cruising for whatever came our way. it sounds really lame, right? but it meant a great deal to me. this sense of being free from plans, schedules, and restrictions was something that i almost never get to experience. 

as we pulled up into the driveway at home, i took my tiny adventure even further when i decided to make dinosaur-shaped muffins! at this point, i just didn't want my lame-but-perfect night end. it took me a good hour and a half to finish, and i felt quite accomplished afterwards. i then watched the ever-so-talented justin timberlake host SNL as i drifted off to sleep at 4-ish.

i know my eventful night may have seemed a bit bland and nerdy, but it's definitely one that will remain in my memory forever. i think the whole beauty of the night revolved around spontaneity. those people who experience such a liberating thing often in their lives are the most fortunate, in my opinion. my whole life is scheduled to a point where nothing is really that exciting. to be able to break away from responsibilities and boundaries was the most exhilarating feeling ever. 

movement

third post of the week! wooooo! haha. i really need to write, since there's so much stress in the atmosphere. it's quite calming and makes me reflect on everything that's happening. 

when i came home early today after testing, i immediately fell asleep. when i woke up from my longer-than-expected nap, i was driven to turn on the tv and search through my long list of DVR recordings. it may have been the best thing i could have done, actually. uncharacteristically, i skipped through my usual gossip girl repeats and disney music videos until i found what i was compelled to watch. 

i'm not exactly sure what made me want to stop looking, but i paused as my eyes read "so you think you can dance." i hadn't watched that show in about 8 months, but something was appealing about it. i wanted to relive those enticing moments that made me fall in love with dancing week after week during the summer. i wanted to see something that made me want to get up and change the world without saying a single word. most of all, though, i wanted to witness some of the most gorgeous moments i have seen in my life during this time of never ending stress.

as soon as the clips from the season started rolling, i was drawn in as if i had never seen something so marvelous before. when the dancers performed their routines, i couldn't help but stand up and move closer to the tv, wishing with all my heart to be a part of something so moving. i even became a bit jealous that people had the skills to express themselves so beautifully and i didn't. (i've been begging my mom to let me take dance lessons for years, just to be shot down with a playful, yet burning, "you're not coordinated enough.")

obviously, my beauty find of the day relates to dancing. but i'm going to widen the category even more to include all forms of expression through movement. i find it absolutely amazing that people can communicate so much without saying anything. meaningful facial expressions and body movements say what a million of the most precisely-chosen words could not. if i had the ability, i would totally do a video blog consisting entirely of dance and music. unfortunately, i lack those skills i long so badly for right now. 

down time

i am in the middle of one of the most important weeks in my life. or so they say. but then again, it is my future (and everyone else's) that people are looking out for. 

anyway, it is indeed the season of those infamous AP tests. while other students are most likely not studying for their CSTs and enjoying early dismissal, the AP students are stuck at home frantically memorizing FDR's New Deal mandates or figuring out how to program some useful formulas into their TI-89 calculators. lovely, lovely, lovely. i can't say i mind, though. although these tests may cause a few gray hairs and twitching eyes due to lack of sleep, they are in fact a measurement of our ability to cram. that is a challenge in itself. one that drives people to the brink of insanity, sadly. and this is where my philosophy comes in...

i have seen too many people shed tears and words of anger over these assessments. sure, they do help indicate to colleges what type of students we are, but the world does not revolve around the AP system. i think we need to realize that these tests were developed to help us in the long-run. it may not seem like it, but it's true. without them we would have no idea what higher-level thinking is. we would not be challenged in school. we would be unprepared for times where determination and hard work are called for. 

as i was taking a break from studying today, i found something worthy of attention and surely beautiful: down time. as appealing as it may sound, studying for 12 hours straight is completely and utterly stressful. instead of working ourselves into emotional wrecks, just a simple 5 minute break every now and then will suffice. whether this down time comes naturally or needs to be forced, it is definitely important. without these tranquil, relaxing moments, i would be not be able to function. 

take a breath, close your eyes, maybe put on some music, and relax. it's not as bad as you think.

embracing my culture

i haven't updated in SOOOO long! i think it's been about 2 weeks.. not that anybody reads this anyway. haha. let's get this started!

okay, so over the past few weeks i think i've become rather attached to my asian roots. i'm absolutely positive that it started the day i met quest crew. i never really embraced my culture before then. i'm afraid to admit that i was actually embarassed of being a part of the asian community, but i'm not sure why. as sad as that may be, i am truly grateful that i am finally able to be proud of the one thing i cannot change in my life. i just wish i would have opened my eyes (no asian pun intended, hahaa) sooner to this marvelous feat that i now love. 

i have found a special place in my heart for each person that has also embraced their culture, from far east movement and quest crew to wong fu productions and david choi. just watching their videos on youtube and reading their blogs online has given me a life's worth of inspiration. it takes a great deal of courage, perseverance, and most of all, passion, to try to make a difference in a community full of young minds not always open to new things. for this, all of these artists, and ones i did not mention, have my utmost respect. 

i apologize for slacking off a bit on my search for daily beauty. however, i think this constitutes for a whole day's, week's, month's, and lifetime's worth of beauty: CULTURE. without it we would be nothing, and because of it, everyone is able to fit in somewhere in the world. if you are reading this, i challenge you: embrace your culture. no matter where you are from or where you're going, it is a wonderful thing that's too important to pass up.